Favors
by DriftingSpirit
Summary: “My sperm is your sperm.”
1. Chapter 1

"It worked."

She looks nervous, which is odd considering you've been having sex with her every couple of nights for the past seven months. But her fingers are laced together behind her back and she rocks back onto the pegged heels of her stilettos. A slight blush has risen into her cheeks and she smiles kind of cheekily at you. Which makes you want to see how far south the blush extends, but you simply nod and stay in your chair.

"Good."

You'd known this was coming, but you're not really ready for it, you realize. Seven months ago, when she had first confided in you about her wishes, you hadn't really covered everything in your somewhat shallow, thorough analysis of the situation. In fact, you probably hadn't actually thought about the end at all seven months ago since it only took you three seconds to agree then. Only now your mistake is coursing through your bloodstream and you hate yourself in that moment because you will never get to touch her again.

"I just thought you might want to know." She leans into the edge of your desk and grins, clearly trying to contain her joy. "And I wanted to say thank you."

You nod again. You seem to be doing a lot of that lately. "My sperm is your sperm."

Her hand slides down the side of your face and rests on your jawbone. "Well, maybe it will forever have been just sex for you. But for me, you have given me the gift of life. And it means more to me than I can put into words."

"But you're going to try anyway." You mumble and hate yourself for such sarcasm when she's being so honest and sweet to you, but you can't help it.

She leans forward and kisses you lightly on the lips. "No, I won't put you through that."

She's out the door before you can think of a reason to call her back, and it's probably for the best. Her and the baby are probably light-years better off without you. Why? You aren't entirely sure. They just are. Still, there is this tightening knot in the pit of your stomach that screeches you've just signed away your peaceful life of solitude.

You pop a Vicodin and grin mischievously to yourself. Bring it on.

**Okay, peeps. This is something I wrote on a whim because I've been suffering from severe writer's block. But if you want me to continue, just let me know and I will. I sorta got a plot in mind. I know this is really short, but like I said, must break the block. This'll hopefully take care of that. So if you want, I'll continue. If you don't, I'll try something else. Your choice. **


	2. Chapter 2

You aren't entirely sure if she's avoiding you or you're avoiding her. Either one is entirely possible. She'd avoid you because, well, of the multitude of reasons you provide daily. Such as, you piss her off, you disrupt her work, and you drive her completely insane. Although, she's fairly used to your shenanigans, so that doesn't sound all that realistic. Its not like you've done anything particularly bad to her in the last few days. So you must be avoiding her. That's possible. She pisses you off, disrupts your work, and drives you completely insane. Wait…

"Cuddy's avoiding me." You say loudly.

Wilson sighs heavily, setting down his sandwich. "You're trying to distract me so you can steal my chips, aren't you?"

You're sitting in the cafeteria enjoying your second lunch of the day with Wilson. Fellow doctors, nurses, and administrators buzz around you, filling the air with chatter and coughs. In hospitals, laughter isn't in abundance. Just coughs. A dry Reuben sits in front of you, no pickles. You are indeed eyeballing Wilson's chips.

"No." You lie shortly. "She's pregnant."

"Cuddy?"

"No, Thirteen." You roll your eyes at him. You snatch his chips as you continue, "Cuddy's eight weeks pregnant."

Wilson's eyebrows lower and he makes a grab at his chips. You lift them delicately out of reach. "How would you know? You aren't exactly her go to guy for exciting news."

"Its mine." You state simply, popping a Lay's potato chip in your mouth.

Eyes wide, he gawks unabashedly at you. "No."

"Cha, I hit that." You bob your eyebrows at him and stand. "Any-who, got to get back to work. Just thought you would want to know I'm gonna be a father."

You hobble out of the cafeteria, leaning heavily on your cane. You can hear Wilson calling after you as he rushes to bus his tray and catch up. How hard could that be? Its not like you can take off running. You move as fast as you can towards the elevator to beat him, but he breaks into a jog and falls in beside you. The elevator dings and the doors slide shut.

"Well, well, well. Alone at last." You grin suggestively at him.

He dismisses your comment easily. "You and Cuddy are sleeping together?"

"Were." You search your pockets for a lollypop, but come up empty. "You got a sucker?"

He gives you that weird look and shakes his head. "No. Since when?"

"I don't know." You say, exasperated. "Like seven months, three weeks, five days, sixteen hours, and twenty seven minutes ago."

"That's… unnecessarily exact."

"Totally, dude."

The elevator reaches your floor and you three-leg it down the hall to your office. Wilson follows closely behind.

"Were you ever planning on telling me about your illicit affair with Cuddy?" He asks, letting the glass doors fall shut behind him.

"I just told you."

"I mean, if she hadn't gotten pregnant. Would you have?"

You shrug. "Let me look into my crystal ball and check out the alternate reality where that happened."

He rolls his eyes at you like you're being childish. He looks at you like that a lot. "Were you sleeping together solely so she'd get pregnant?"

"Are you trying to ask me if she was any good?"

He seems somewhat stunned by your question. "I'm trying to figure out how any of this could happen and how I didn't know anything about it for seven months!"

"Seven months, three weeks, five days, sixteen hours, and twenty seven minutes."

"Whatever!" Wilson exclaims. "I especially don't understood how your love for gossip allowed you to keep something this juicy from me."

You shrug.

Suddenly Wilson is all grins and happy eyes again. "House… You love her."

You frown deeply at him. "Why is it you try to explain all my behavior with that? With you, everything I do boils down to caring or loving somebody. Maybe you should talk to somebody about that."

"I should talk to somebody?" Wilson chokes. "I'm not saying everything comes down to that, I'm saying _this_ does. You didn't tell me to protect her."

"Psshh." You laugh. "I don't even have a comeback to that. You've finally conquered me."

"If you didn't, you'd have ran to me to giggle and taunt me until you couldn't hold it in any longer. Then you would have gloated about it and smirked while I tried to comprehend what she could possibly see in you." Wilson smiles, satisfied.

"I do not _run_ anywhere, let alone away from free sex. It has nothing to do with love. Just, why rent the cow when you can get the milk for free?" You smirk.

"_Rent_ the cow?" Wilson rolls his eyes. "Moving on. How are you going to raise a kid with Cuddy?"

Your eyes cut from Wilson to the rest of your office where your team is waiting. And staring at you. You grin and wave at them.

"House!" Wilson scolds.

"Don't worry, mommy and daddy will still play with you even with a new baby around." You mutter and cross the threshold to your team. "People of Mars! This is your leader! What ruling must I bequeath today?"

Your afternoon passes fairly uneventfully. Case, sick people, Thirteen, The Dark One, yada, yada, yada. At a quarter to five, you slip your ear buds into your ears and click on some good, old, classic rock. Your head bobs to the music as you ninja your way out of the hospital to the best of your crippled ability. Cuddy's waiting for you at your motorcycle, arms crossed, lips thinned, sour expression.

"Let me guess, I've been a very naughty boy." You bob your eyebrows at her and attach your cane to the side of the motorcycle.

Her lips quirk into a smile. "Actually, for once, no."

"So you weren't avoiding me?" You ask.

"Why would I be?" She frowns at you. "Should I be?"

"No," You shake your head. "That just means I'm avoiding you. Gotta run, then."

"Why does one of us have to be avoiding the other?" She questions incredulously.

"Ask Wilson."

You leave her standing in front of the hospital with that look she wears when she thinks you are acting like you've completely lost your marbles. You repeat the conversation in your head, overanalyzing it each time, decide you don't care, and then finally discard it. Motorcycles are fun.

Home has always felt a little too empty to be called that. The piano music you fill the condo with every night isn't enough to counteract. Standing in the living room and screaming at the top of your lungs doesn't help. It just makes you look stupid. And you don't like to look stupid. So even if that did work you probably wouldn't do it regularly. It never felt like this when Cuddy was over. Maybe you should hire someone to bake cookies or something.

A vibration starts in your pocket and you fetch the phone out. "Speak."

"Do you deliberately contort conversations so I can't get out what I'm trying to say?"

"Oh, hey, Cuddy. How's things?" You say with a slight lisp.

"I was just going to ask you if you wanted to come to my next doctor's appointment. I'm getting an ultrasound." She tells you.

"Do you want me there?" You ask playfully.

"I'm not going to force you to do anything, House. I told you when we started this that you don't have to be involved at all."

"Do you want me there?" You repeat.

"House."

"Do you?"

"Yes." She says hesitantly.

"Was that so hard?" You smirk at the phone. "I'll be there."

**Someday these chapters will get longer. Sorry for the incredibly long wait. I really have no explanation to defend my actions. Go ahead and throw tomatoes…. Anyway. I'm having a boring summer, which forces me to live in alternate realities, which means good news for my fictions. Hopefully this is the first of many updates. **

**Please review and let me know what you think.**


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